Sensuality and Power in Self-Portraiture with Film Photographer Kyla Elliott

Many photographers shy away from the camera, preferring to work in the background and capture the beauty of the world in front of them. There are some, though, like Kyla Elliott, who become their muse. While not always easy, being in front of the lens proves to be cathartic and helpful not just for the development of their craft, but also for exploring and expressing their inner worlds.

We recently had a chat with Kyla about the enchanting and thoughtful self-portraits on her LomoHome. Her themes allude to the mystique and power that underlies femininity.

Hi, Kyla! Welcome to the magazine. Can you tell us about yourself? What got you into film photography and what keeps you shooting film now?

Sure! I’m Kyla, I’m 31, and I’m from Arizona, USA. I started shooting film in early 2019. I had been shooting digital for a couple years and just felt like I could never get the editing right or get my photos to look how I wanted them to. Then one day I came across some film photos on Instagram and was totally mesmerized. I scrolled through film accounts and hashtags and realized these images possessed the qualities I didn’t even know I was searching for.

There was depth, an air of authenticity, imperfection, and vibrant, unique colors. I also experienced a wave of nostalgia as my mind flashed back to all the film photos my dad took when I was a kid. These things are what keep me coming back to film. I honestly don’t think I could ever go back to digital shooting on a regular basis.

Can you tell us how you started taking self-portraits? What draws you to it?

Thank you! I started self portraiture when I got into film, I had never really explored it before. I think because although I loved to shoot with my friends as models, people were not always available at the drop of a hat whenever I had new ideas. So I figured I could be my own model.

I was initially drawn just to experiment, but then I realized that taking my own portraits was very illuminating to my relationship with myself and how I perceived my body. I had always struggled with low confidence and self esteem and I found it difficult to believe in my own beauty. But the more I took photos of myself, the more I started to heal that fractured part of myself.

I became able to observe myself non-critically and it has helped me connect to my femininity and my sensuality. I think my self portraiture journey has collided with my spiritual journey in some ways too. As I have become my own muse I’m more in touch with how I can self-actualize and connect with my own power and potential.

How would you describe the intention behind your art? Is it a reflection of your inner world or how you see the world around you?

It is definitely a reflection of my inner world. I think a lot of us do this, but I spend a lot of time in my head. I tend to ruminate about the past, my desires, my failures, my beliefs, my feelings. So, I think all of that needs a way to escape and like many creatives, it comes out through my art.

My images feel like a window into my soul because there is a part of me that comes out in each one. If I am able to capture a feeling or a mood on film, it’s kind of like a way for me to release it from myself. I like to think of the film absorbing my energy and emotions and transmuting them into something more tangible. It feels like lifting a burden or a weight off my shoulders and surrendering it.

How do you prepare for each shoot and how do you come up with the themes?

I typically shoot in my house so I will set up a backdrop and get out any props I’m using. It’s usually a prop or an object that inspires the whole concept for a shoot. Whether that’s fruit, a vase, a mirror, a specific piece of clothing or something that can be worn, I tend to take one or two things and then see what kinds of different images I can create with it.

Sometimes I sit and meditate or stretch for a few minutes before shooting just to feel more grounded in my body.

Where do you take inspiration for your photo shoots?

I feel very inspired by the timeless beauty of the female form and of the exploration of womanhood. I think this is another way my spirituality and my art overlap. I would say I’m also heavily influenced by art history and old paintings from the Renaissance, Romantic, Baroque and Pre-Raphaelite periods.

We noticed you've tried some Lomography film stocks. How was your experience shooting films such as the LomoChrome Metropolis? What did you like or not like about it?

Lomography makes some of my favorite films ever! LomoChrome Metropolis is a beautiful film, I love how the colors are shifted from what you would observe in life. It has a muted and somber feeling so it’s good for communicating a sense of melancholy.

It’s a bit surreal looking too which helps me create images that feel dreamy and disconnected from reality. I love that it has a variable ISO so you can really experiment. I actually don’t think there is anything I dislike about it!

For your LomoChrome Metropolis portraits, what were your inspirations?

I have been having a difficult time with my health for the past few years. I’ve experienced a lot of anxiety that has resulted in me becoming agoraphobic and basically not ever leaving my house. Anxiety can be a mental prison but when it advances to the point where you feel physically imprisoned, it’s absolutely maddening. You feel trapped. You feel hopeless and depressed. You feel like life will never be fun or enjoyable again.

I’ve had some ups and downs but the LomoChrome Metropolis album was in a very low time and I remember not leaving my house for weeks on end. I felt like a princess trapped in a tower. This whole experience with anxiety has essentially trained me to look for beauty in very mundane things because I am confined to the same space all the time.

That roll was also shot at a time I started looking more critically at my deeply and sincerely held religious beliefs. I felt very overwhelmed by the possibility of changing my belief structure but I also knew I had to. I think that’s why that roll has a sense of longing and loss. It also feels reflective and introspective because that’s what was going on with me at the time.

You also tried out the LomoChrome Color '92 recently. How was your experience and what did you think about the results?

I did really enjoy the film! I realized I didn’t try it at all in day light so I will have to do that next time. I like how the tones are kind of cool and muted but it still picks up red really well too. Love the thick grain! It’s very unique, I will definitely shoot it again soon. And I feel special that it’s named after my birth year.

Do you have a particular favorite among all your self portraits?

Picking a favorite is so hard! I think probably this one though. It’s a double exposure of some pomegranates over my body that I shot recently on Fuji 400. I’ve developed a little obsession with pomegranates because of their symbolism. They are emblematic of fertility, femininity, passion, sexuality, death and rebirth.

Pomegranates have very obvious dark and light spaces, and I think they silently but profoundly communicate the concept of duality. To me, it’s like looking at a microcosm of existence and of how it feels to be human. We are all both our light and our shadow. Life can be full of joy, love, and adventure, and it can feel so vibrant. But it can also pull us achingly through longing, fear, grief and disappointment.

There is always positive and negative, we can’t have one without the other. With this image, I was so happy I nailed the focusing (a major obstacle in film self portraiture) and the placement of the two images overlapping. I love double exposures but very rarely do I feel like I truly succeeded in creating what I originally envisioned. This was one of the times I felt I did get it just right.

Lastly, do you have any projects, film-related or not, that you'd still like to try?

Yes so many! I would like to work more with the intention of getting my work printed and out into the world. But also in the near future my friend Maddie and I are going to work on creating an oracle deck using our images. That will be something totally new for both of us so I am excited to see how it goes.

I love shooting double exposure rolls with friends so I have a couple of those coming down the line too. I recently souped a roll for the first time and I am about to send that off for development and see the results. I tend to find new inspiration all the time so I feel like there is always something in the works!

We'd like to thank Kyla for sharing her images and stories with us! To view more of her work, visit her LomoHome or Instagram Page.

written by sylvann on 2024-03-08 #culture #people #self-portraits #lomochrome-color-92 #kyla-elliott